J a n c e e D u n n

Dinah's column

My sister Dinah writes an excellent column for the Cranford Chronicle (she lives in Cranford, New Jersey) called 'Burb Basics. Her column centers around issue of life in the suburbs (and I live in New York City, where my distinctly urban issues include "Why did my cab driver just empty out a cup of urine when we paused at a stoplight, and when, exactly, did he fill it up?")
But it always has fresh, practical, interesting information that everybody can use.

Here is the latest:

Get Smart

When I was a teenager, we were expected to bring something to the table, both literally and figuratively. My mom worked fulltime, so we had to cook dinner most nights. And when we ate, we had to contribute to the conversation. No responding with one-word answers or sitting there in a sulk—my mother expected us to be both smart and funny. (In fact, in her list of attributes she wished we possessed it went Smart, Funny, Pretty, Athletic, in that order.)

And so we tried. My older sister practically put on a vaudeville act. My younger sister broke long silences with enthusiastic outbursts. I landed somewhere in the middle. But by the time we moved out, we were all good dinner companions.

Later I realized what a boon it was that my mom challenged us to be both interested and interesting. That curiosity had led to a life full of schemes and enthusiasms. But has it really made me smart?

I decided to see by taking an IQ test, which I can’t remember ever doing. I tried IQTEST.com. The test is free but detailed results cost $9.95, which you don’t find out until you’ve already taken the text. (Vexing, to say the least.) However they did email me my IQ score, as well as the following chart to see where I landed on the scale.

40 – 54: Severely challenged (Less than 1 percent of test takers)
55 – 69: Challenged (2.3 percent of test takers)
70 – 84: Below average
85 – 114: Average (68 percent of test takers)
115 – 129: Above average
130 – 144: Gifted (2.3 percent of test takers)
145 – 159: Genius (Less than 1 percent of test takers)
160 – 175: Extraordinary genius

My score was higher than average (which is 100) but surely wouldn’t get me into Mesna (which only accepts 148 and above). But is a 15-minute test on the Internet really the way to determine intelligence?

When I was younger, the way to show off how smart you are was your SAT score, which at the time went to 1600. However Bill Clinton, who is also pretty bright, only scored 1032. And George Bush, who isn’t known for his brains, scored 1206. I did pretty well in high school and am constantly learning in book publishing. I was sure I’d ace it now.

Oh, was I wrong. I forgot you spend years memorizing stuff just to succeed at that test. I looked at a few sample SAT questions and couldn’t answer one of them. The definition of “coeval”? Determine the area of a trapezoid? Here’s one I just stared at blankly:

A piggy bank contains 300 pennies, 45 nickels, and 132 quarters. If the number of pennies is reduced by 50 percent and the number of quarters is increased by 25 percent, what is the probability that a randomly drawn coin will be a nickel?
A. 45 in 477
B. 1 in 8
C. 45 in 315
D. 1 in 4
E. 45 in 432

The correct answer is B. I know that because I looked at the answer key, which I guess makes me pretty smart. But I’ve got nothing on high schoolers—that test is HARD!

Dinah Dunn

Comments

I read them all and I've said it before but I really think I have the funniest, most clever readers.

A few have posed questions which I will answer:

1.) Yes, I have watched The Wire. My father wore me down to a nub and I started tuning in and I have to agree that, as he has said many, many, many times, 'the characters are very complex and interesting' and 'the writing is exceptional.' But now that he won that campaign, he is raging out of control. The last time I visited he had me watch Bryant Gumbel's sports-related talk show, another one of his obsessions, even though the closest I get to sports is the elliptical machine at the gym. I can already hear the phone call I'm going to get: "I read your blog and the show isn't about sports, it's so much more than that, they feature human stories that we can all relate to, and I really think you should give it another shot, because"....etc..etc...etc.

2.) One sharp-eyed reader asked about someone whom I mentioned had bullied me as a kid in "Don't You Forget About Me." It is not the same person, but you're right, it's an unusual name, so how strange is that? You know, I really shouldn't have put her name in that book, come to think about it. I suppose it's sort of passive-aggressive to get revenge in print.

3.) Yes, I continue to buy Lotto and scratch-off tickets, mostly to humor my mother. In fact for Christmas I surprised everyone - I had them shut their eyes at the dinner table and then plunked down a pile of five scratch-offs per person. The luxurious, five-dollar scratch-offs, I might add. I don't screw around. Of course, no one won a thing, but it was still fun.

4.) To the Brazilian readers who take the time to write me: thank you.

Playful foxes on a trampoline

Nothing more need be said, really.

I originally saw this on the wonderful boingboing.net:

Again with "The Brotherhood"

Does anyone else out there have a retired father who maniacally campaigns to get you to watch their favorite TV shows?

Over the past few years I have been the recipient of countless phone calls and e mails from my father extolling the joys of The Wire, The Shield, and Battlestar Galactica.

His latest enthusiasm is a show called The Brotherhood. My sister Dinah made him a covert.
After I ignored his phone message about the program's 'quality writing,' he e mailed Dinah (subject: 'The Brotherhood.' 'Dinah, thanks for hooking us! It's REALLY good. Love, Dad.') Then he CC'd me, like it was a business memo. Apparently the man will not rest until I watch it.

Thanks, Library Journal!

The Reader's Shelf: Reality Chicks Pen Juicy Memoirs
Edited by Neal Wyatt -- Library Journal, 2/1/2009

The publication of Helen Fielding's Bridget Jones's Diary set the genre of chick lit firmly on the path to success, and it has been marching along in stiletto heels ever since. While these humorous tales of plucky (often young) heroines are often considered the epitome of lighthearted reading, they maintain a firm grasp on some of the core situations and issues many women face. But not all chicks write fiction. Addressing the same topics, the following authors infuse their nonfiction works with a hip, just-between-us-gals tone that allow readers to sink their teeth into some juicy memoirs and essays without sacrificing the fun.

As Bridget Jones could attest, lots of gals like their self-help books. In Helping Me Help Myself (Morrow. 2008. ISBN 978-0-06-114396-0. $24.95), free-spirited Beth Lisick awakens on New Year's Day with an injured leg and the realization that doing “the splits on both sides” may not be enough of a life goal for a 37-year-old woman. Embarking on a year of self-improvement, Lisick chooses a different topic and guru every month, and, although skeptical, she brings a truly inquiring, curious mind to each.

Even some of the best chick heroines can be more than a tad self-seeking, but they have nothing on Jen Lancaster in Bitter is the New Black (NAL: Penguin Group [USA]. 2006. ISBN 978-0-451-21760-8. pap. $15). Her forthright, opinionated, conservative voice explodes out of this hilarious account of a life riding the dot-com wave from the high of a fabulous job and apartment in Chicago to the crashing low of losing her job and ending up at the unemployment office—where she learns not to carry a Prada bag when applying for benefits.

Novelist Valerie Frankel is no stranger to the weight and body issues that often pop up in chick lit. Her first memoir, Thin is the New Happy (St. Martin's. 2008. ISBN 978-0-312-37392-4. $23.95), chronicles a life spent dieting, starting with the diet her mother put her on as a chubby 11-year-old. Frankel tenaciously confronts the lifetime of emotional baggage that created the adult who, in one day alone, counted 263 negative thoughts about her body.

Sloan Crosley's I Was Told There'd Be Cake (Riverhead: Penguin Group [USA]. 2008. ISBN 978-1-59448-306-6. pap. $14) puts a spin on the familiar territory of a twentysomething working in New York. Crosley's highly original essays cover a wide swath of quirky topics, from her hoarding of plastic toy ponies to baking a cookie in the likeness of her difficult, high-powered publisher boss.

Glamorous careers are a chick lit staple, and writing for magazines such as Rolling Stone puts Jancee Dunn in the big time. But Enough About Me (Harper Paperbacks: HarperCollins. 2006. ISBN 978-0-06-084365-6. pap. $13.95) follows her meandering path from a pop-culture-saturated New Jersey childhood to a life navigating the trendy world of the Big Apple. What doesn't change is the sense of giddy delight she shares as she interviews celebrities from Bono to Loretta Lynn.

Some chicks are looking for their careers. In her funny and fascinating Well Enough Alone (Riverhead: Penguin Group [USA]. 2008. ISBN 978-1-59448-991-4. $23.95), Jennifer Traig spends more time choosing outfits than she does working toward her Ph.D. Finding her place in the world is made more difficult by her intense hypochondria.

While it may be easy to keep fiction light and frothy, the real world is not always that simple. As Lopsided (Viking. 2008. ISBN 978-0-670-01928-1. $24.95) begins, Meredith Norton is an American living in Paris with her French husband. While on a stateside visit with her family, she consults a doctor about a pain in her breast. Within days she is told she has inflammatory breast cancer. The author's sharp, unsentimental voice and unflinching eye for detail make this an intense and surprisingly funny memoir of survival.

Chicks are obsessed with relationships and marriage—especially when things go wrong. And everything has gone wrong in Suzanne Finnamore's divorce memoir, Split (Dutton. 2008. ISBN 978-0-525-95046-2. $24.95). After her adored, charming, and urbane husband suddenly leaves her and their young child, Finnamore is cast into an emotional and financial tumult. Her pain and anger are almost palpable in this beautifully written book.

What would this list be without a book on clothing? Clothes make the woman in Gigi Anders's exuberant Men May Come and Men May Go...But I've Still Got My Little Pink Raincoat (Rayo: HarperCollins. 2007. ISBN 978-0-06-111885-2. $19.95). Whether searching for the elusive Gap pink raincoat or the exactly right shade of red lipstick, Anders explores why fashion can mean so much and what makes her believe that donning that particular outerwear can actually change a relationship.

This column was contributed by Lisa Davis-Craig, an Adult Services Librarian, Canton Public Library, MI, and a reviewer of chick lit for LJ